Selfish Bugger in the World

I am lost my self now....

Never know I am such bad friend to Candice!

She brough out all my past...counting on my drama isuues....

some I even not remember....yes...I am bad....

guesss she hate me....

why? she said she see thru my true face

what's my true face?

but I got the clue...

the friendship in between she and me is over....

I might be a bad friend, I might a selfish ego bugger....

but never try to remember what friend done to me in past...

I had to face t..the friendship is over by now....

20 years ago...the old story, what did I done to her....she never forget about it....

But girl...20 years ago....I am FOB, how could I know the 1800 number is not free to call?

Said when you are really really depressed, I ask you help....girl...remember I just moved out from my ex-bf house....it was run away move out...
I dont have any thing....

then after.. I am suffer in depressed too.....

I never know how to sweet talk to people around me...

first time I said to my mother, and tell her I love her...it was face her cold body....

I missing Geby so so so much...and hate me self why not spend more time with him....damn it my depressed....I even missing the chance to tell Geby I love him..before he closed his eyes.

only I can do just kiss his cold face.............

I pray to the God, I willing cut my life to my mother and my father....

but my mother is gone forever, I only have my father now...only my father...

God remember, I dont need to have long life, but my father need it...I want my father can have grand grand childern.....

God, remember I dont want live long.....